Do you ever think why people argue? It can be a distressing and unpleasant experience and no one should seek out fights intentionally. However, arguments are inevitable. Whether it be your friends, siblings, colleagues or partner, everyone has different emotional triggers and a unique way to process information.
Conflicts arise in all meaningful relationships and we should learn to embrace them. Remember not to go into conflicts when your emotions are too raw or when you’re not ready to hear the other side of the story. Healthy arguing can be beneficial for your relationship and we should learn to see it as an opportunity instead of an ultimatum.
Here are a few reasons why we should all argue more often and let it all out:
Arguing provides perspective
While arguing can be an uncomfortable thing to experience, it can sometimes give a much needed perspective. Conflicts and arguments usually bring to the surface things that really matter to us. They can be helpful in reminding us about our core values and goals. Similarly, they highlight the beliefs and values of the other person and give us a chance to view things from their point of view.
So, the next time you feel yourself coming close to an argument, instead of getting worked up, stay curious about things it might reveal.
It might be hard to believe, but arguments can actually facilitate your conversations and help them move forward. Instead of viewing it as a threat, try to see an argument as a normal part of a social process. It opens up the space for different conversations and discussions that may benefit your knowledge and also give you a chance to express yourself.
The next time you find yourself in an argument, try to stay flexible. We should be open to changing our opinions based on the knowledge being provided to us. You never know, you might actually learn something that changes your opinion.
It makes you a good listener
Let’s be honest, not many people we know are good listeners. Most people are only interested in talking about their own interests. So, be the change you want to see!
During an argument, it’s important to always listen to the other person. Listening does not mean that you have accepted their opinions and have lost the argument, but rather it gives you chance to show empathy. It is a chance to reflect on their feelings and understand them. Listening can also be used as a power move. It can help you in understanding what the other person is actually upset about and what you can do about it.
Arguments help with critical thinking
In most cases arguments are unavoidable but, done right, they can hone your critical thinking skills. We try to base our arguments on facts and reasoning that is generally supported by evidence — at least most of the time.
Conflict is a process of listening and responding to one another. It gives you space to critically evaluate the situation and access your reasoning as well as your partner’s. Imparting all that information while explaining your point of view during an argument is no easy feat. It comes down to your communication and critical thinking skills.
As humans, we are bound to have some social interaction. Giving up talking to people is generally not an option. Most likely in our lives, we’ll come across many ambitious people who enjoy a good argument. It could be your boss, friends or your partner and you cannot change their attitude. These arguments can teach you to be patient with other people.
Having patience does not mean bending to someone’s will every time, rather it means not letting your emotions be affected by someone else’s words, a skill that will make your life a lot easier in the longer run.
Ask for help
Sign up for an appointment at the Dispute Resolution Clinic (DRC), a free service launched by IGNITE in partnership with Humber College. Experts at the DRC offer ways to resolve your conflict in a peaceful manner when you’re struggling to argue constructively.
During your appointment, you’ll sit down with a mediator and the person whom you’re in disagreement with and try to resolve the conflict through various techniques.
The DRC is currently taking virtual appointments. Sign up today through SimplyBook.me.
Remember, it’s okay to argue.
Conflict is not always a threat that indicates the end of a relationship. Instead, letting it all out in a healthy manner can actually benefit your relationship with people and help you in moving forward.
Relationships are valuable. Learn the importance of maintaining healthy relationships in our work, school and social lives.
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