The art of letting go

It’s time to lighten the load.

As humans, holding on is one of our natural tendencies. We crave what’s familiar because it’s easy and comfortable. But you know what else we are capable of? Change. Easier said than done; change is the price of progress. It’s a process we get to fully become when we start letting go of things holding us back.

As post-secondary students, we experience many changes. We go to school wearing our sense of self and our pockets full of dreams. But soon, we’re faced with new challenges that can test our confidence and everything we thought we knew about ourselves. Before you know it, our old ways are no longer working.

So, this is for you — when what used to work doesn’t anymore and when there’s still so much to unpack. Letting go isn’t a sign of giving up — it’s a shift, a soft revolt against what no longer serves you. By unlearning old patterns you once relied on, you make room for something new.

Here are some things you need to let go of — and how to deal with them.

Letting go of certainty

An animation of a boy with a bag pack walking on a trail that diverges into two different directions. — *Via GIPHY*

In post-secondary education, the straightforward path from elementary to high school ends. There are no longer rigid guidelines dictating which grade you should tackle next. Now, you’re in your own lane, calling the shots on which program best aligns with your goals. The road may seem uncertain and is largely dependent on your decisions. It can feel unpredictable, too, making your next steps feel like guesses in the dark.

→ Practice: Focus on your sphere of control

If uncertainty feels unsettling, ground yourself in the small certainties you can control. The trick is to start simple, like making your bed, making your morning coffee or planning your day. These everyday habits help you be grounded. A reminder that while the future is unknown, your next step doesn’t have to be.

Letting go of perfection

A man is smiling while painting in a canvas. Text on the screen reads, "We don't make mistakes - we just have happy accidents." — *Via GIPHY*

Perfectionism is the most common thief of progress. It convinces you that if something isn’t flawless, it isn’t worth it. Letting go of perfection isn’t about setting the bar low — it’s about freeing yourself from perfection paralysis. When we let unrealistic standards go and accept that mistakes are necessary milestones, growth happens. They aren’t failures—they’re proof you’re trying, learning and becoming a better version of yourself.

→ Practice: Celebrate small imperfections

Start letting go by embracing being good enough and celebrating trying. This technique is best done by embracing imperfections made along the way. Start looking at mistakes as teachable moments. When you “fail,” write down three things you learned from the experience and take them as guiding posts to let your setback be a stage for your comeback.

Letting go of people

A black and white GIF of a couple letting go of each other's hand. Text on the screen reads, "I gotta go my own way." — *Via GIPHY*

A bittersweet realization of growing up is that some people come and go in your life. Some are meant to stay for a lifetime, some just for a season. Friendships or romantic relationships change over time, with some drifting apart and others growing distant. You might lose people who once felt permanent, but the beauty of letting go of people you outgrew is that you gain space for deeper, more aligned connections.

→ Practice: Compassionate closure

Write a letter to the person you’ve fallen apart with — you don’t have to send it. Write everything you need to say — all your hurt and frustrations. By doing so, you get to empty the negative emotions you’ve been carrying.

Acknowledge the lesson learned from your encounter with this person and thank them for the part they played in your life, even if it was just for a while. Letting go doesn’t mean you didn’t love—it means you love yourself enough to keep moving forward.

Letting go of who you thought you were

Jimmy Fallon sits on a chair behind a table, waving both of his hands to his left. Text on the screen reads, "That's the old me." — *Via GIPHY*

As you begin a new chapter, you might have to unlearn some of the things you were taught about success, failure and who you’re supposed to be — and that’s perfectly OK. Post-secondary is the best place to strip away labels. You’re no longer just “the athlete” or “the quiet one” — you’re evolving, discovering new interests and reimagining your identity.

→ Practice: Identity Rebirth

Start identifying yourself as a free, formless being. Nothing is set in stone. Instead of saying that an activity is unlike you, start exploring new hobbies, styles of learning or challenging opinions you’ve once believed to be true.

On a piece of paper, draw yourself in the middle — it doesn’t have to look like art. Around your drawing, write all the words and phrases you would like yourself to embody in a year’s time. By deciding who you want to become, you can make more intentional choices to be that person while never losing sight of the fact that you’re not confined to your past self. You are allowed to evolve!

Letting go of fear

Fear from the movie "Inside Out" is panicking as he presses on multiple buttons in the control board. — *Via GIPHY*

Fear can get sneaky. Although it doesn’t always show up as panic or hesitation, fear can wear the masks of overthinking, procrastination or staying stuck in the familiar just because it feels safe. But at its core, fear often reflects a deep resistance to change.

Fear will try to convince you that staying in place is better than risking the unknown. The art lies in learning to move anyway—to feel the fear and still take that leap of faith. You don’t have to be fearless to grow, you just have to be brave enough not to let fear decide for you.

→ Practice: Micro-bravery

Do one thing that scares you a little every day, like speaking up in class or asking a question. Talk to a stranger or go out of your way to go to the gym. Whatever fear may look like for you, get your foot in the door by taking small strides to get that fear out. The dread shrinks when faced in small, consistent ways.

And so, we let go

An animation of a white dandelion in a red background. The seeds are blown by the wind. — *Via GIPHY*

Keep in mind that the act of letting go isn’t a vulnerability; it’s inner bravery and it makes you human. Letting go isn’t about forgetting or giving up—it’s about creating space; space for new beginnings, new stories and a version of you that feels more true. As a post-secondary student, you’re not just studying for a degree—you’re learning how to live, how to grow and how to release the weight of what no longer fits.

So here’s to the small, quiet rebellion and the inner battles we often don’t talk about. Here’s to being brave enough to let go—not because it’s easy, but because you’re worthy of what’s to come.

You’re not behind, you’re just becoming.

Feature image courtesy of Anthony Tran via Unsplash.

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